BORE YOU
So, I can’t come up with interesting words to write, but I can point a camera and click a button. So now I offer up to you the most boring photo essay. Ever. (and I know boring photo essays, I work at an art college!).
1) My new home!
This is my new place. It’s a little duplex in south Minneapolis near everything! I will live on the right side and I can do my own window box. Yay.
This is the only picture I have of the place right now, I move on Saturday, though.
2) Ghengis goes to the Dog Park!
Ghengis runs.
Ghengis incites trouble.
Almost got him.
Ghengis waits in the car while I buy a custard filled doughnut and ass coffee.
3) How to Make Breakfast.
This is by far the most boring pictoral. ever. Seriously, who wants to see what I make for breakfast?
Pre-maduros!
Post maduros. Actually, these were halfway between tostones and maduros. Too ripe and sweet to be tostones, but just NOT quite ripe enough to be marduros. I also sliced them too thin so they got crispy, BUT I loved them this way. I added some kosher salt at service and they were wonderful. A little sweet, a little salty.
Mise en Place people! Prep everything. Here we have mushrooms (so nasty), asparagus and tomatoes.
Saute over high heat. I learned after the fact that you are not supposed to cook mushrooms to death. What do I know, I hate mushrooms!
Add your spinach. So good for you. Add way more than you think you need. It cooks down more than you realize.
The spinach cooks way down to nothing, concentrating all the vitaminy goodness just for you.
Add even more spinach. Adding more spinach not only makes you healthy but it uses up the copious amounts of spinach that you find in your fridge that you have to use or it will turn into a massive green funk in a week.
Tomatoes have lycopene. Lycopene is the trendy new nutrient that all the ketchup bottles tell me about. I get most of my nutritional information from ketchup bottles. It was good enough for the Gipper, it’s good enough for me.
Finally we add the egg. We’re making scrambled eggs! Good for us. All the health benefits of the vegetables are being drown in a sea of eggy cholesterol.
Pick your spices wisely. I went with pepper and Penzeys Greek Seasoning. I could have gone with any combination of 2.32 million spices located in a drawer, conveniently labelled and dying to be used. The best thing about this drawer (and one of my favorite activities) is that everything gets dumped every 6 months and replaced with fresh stuff (either new, or from the freezer). I’m sick, I love doing this.
To add insult to the vegetable’s injury we proceed to scoop a bunch of chevre into the mess. So good…so very good.
And here’s breakfast. Scrambled eggs, pseudo-marduros, french bread, orange juice and coffee. Since I’m in the middle of packing you have to sort of shove shit around and pretend you are having a civilized meal at a real table with real manners.
And it’s over. Breakfast was delightful. Perhaps next time you could join us, I might even make pancakes.
So there you have it, these are the pictures hanging out on my camera. You get to see them. They don’t really mean anything.
It’s 11:50 pm, I’ve had some crackers, some cheese and I’m drinking a beer. I need dinner and fast.
