Got one thing done! Went to IKEA! Jetsy (betsy and jessi) went with and were phenomenal at their duties keeping in line. Picture frames, a few geegaws, some wooden coat hangers, napkins!
NAPKINS! I have this thing about IKEA napkins. When I go I HAVE to buy a pack of each color or design I run across and if you’ve been to IKEA you know that they have about 2 metric buttloads of napkin designs that change out regularly. I’m sick for the napkins, I love them, I coordinate them to the food I am serving. I bought napkins, but Jetsy made sure I only bought napkins for the party. And that’s it. 3 packs of cocktail napkins and no more.
I bought many picture frames. Joy. Now I can print up fun pictures of the boy and the dogs and my travels. Jetsy tried to encourage me to be creative by buying the plain wooden frames and painting them, but I’m not creative and I know when I attempt stuff like that it looks…wrong.
My morning was very very bad. Not bad in a depressing way, but bad in a kafka-esque workplace kind of way. Absurdly bad.
I went to Cupcake for lunch today and that made it a million times better! Brought home many many cupcakes today. Cupcake makes a bad morning better.
The bad morning was so bad and I was so bored* that i was forced to…SHOP! Okay, I bought 2 things I (sort of) needed. I needed to upgrade to OSX Tiger (grrrrrrowl) and the IT guy reminded me that I get the school discount through Apple. DUH! I completely forgot about that! So I got Tiger for cheap. Then I needed memory and while I do get a discount from Apple for that, their idea of a discount is to use lube before grinding in. I did not purchase my memory from Apple.
These things should be arriving soon and my computer will become space age.
Go me.
Okay, bubbo out, I’m off to bed early.
* Technically, I’m not allowed to say I was bored because admitting I was bored would make the security guards look bad and certainly we wouldn’t want to make them look bad. Honestly, though, I’m not sure that anything I said could make them look any worse than they are managing to do by haranguing the IT guys to install chat programs on their computers so they can chat with their ‘girlfriends’ while they are at work. I thought I had little to do at my job, but my god, it’s not like I have time to chat! Oh yeah, they’re fucking powerhouses of hard work up there writing their novella length love letters, talking on the phone, cooking food on a fucking george foreman grill and now CHATTING.

Here’s some advice from me to you, it’s asdvice that should seem obvious, but I’m retarded and I have to believe that statistically speaking there are other retards out there that need this advice. Anyway…If you find a stray xanax in your purse, a xanax that was not prescribed to you, don’t think “man, my anxiety has been rather high lately, I will take this pill!”. It will make you hyper and also kill your sex drive. Like kill it dead for something like 3 days.
Pretty hard to kill my sex drive, the little pink pill succeeded.
I’m sure everyone in a 3 mile radius is pretty pleased at this development and is sleeping more comfortably.
yeah? well screw you, pink pill wore off!
And now the time has come for the lists. Every time I have something big coming up I have to make lists and of course I must post the lists on here so that you, my faithful reader (all 18 of you) can see how mundane my life is…
* move fish tank to basement. There’s just no way I can get it set up in time and the thing with a 55 gallon aquarium is that you can’t just put water in there and then dump some fish in. You have to put in the water, treat it, get it to temperature, buy 2 fish, let them live and eat and poop in there for a few days, buy 3 more fish, let them live and eat and poop for a few days. Soon, enough poop builds up to feed the bacteria that eats the poop and ammonia and whatnot and keeps the tank happy. If I were to set up now, I’d probably have like 4 fish in there by the time of the party. So, the tank goes in the basement for now and that clears up space for standing.
* move the tv out of the living room. We can do this closer to the day of the party, but it takes up room that could be used for standing or sitting or eating.
* grocery shop. I need to find a way to bribe/coordinate with my sister so that I might go to Costco with her and use her membership. My sister’s birthday is coming up, please wish her a happy birthday and all that. April, I love you and you are pretty and I love that you got a hedgehog!
* IKEA shop, I know I said I shouldn’t go to IKEA because I will buy party geegaws, but you know what? I want party geegaws. I like them, I want them, it’s my party and I’ll geegaw all I want. I’ll go with a couple coworkers who have promised to keep me on track with the frames and geegaw hunting.
* Get hair cut, bleached and dyed. Next wednesday. It’s cutting it close, but that’s where it’s at. Still trying to pick a color.
* Clean carpets. That’s saturday. Carpets must be cleaned before guests arrive.
* Quite often I start a post and then go somewhere and then come back. We just took the dogs for a walk. Did you miss me?
* Pick out serving dishes. People think I’m a freak for this, but I pick out my serving dishes in advance, i write the names of the items I am serving on to little post it notes and stick the notes to the dishes. This way I know things are going to be laid out well and I’m not trying to stick half a salmon in a souffle dish because everything else is being used!
* Talk to neighbor about losgistics. I don;t want her to be angry with me for us being too loud or something, so we’ll figure out how to have the best laid out party ever. Smokers to the front of the house and all quiet at the back. That should work well.
* Make a liquor store list. My well stocked liquor cabinet has been dwindling for a while now and my last party (a year ago) wiped out a lot fo reserves. Mostly I’ll have wine and beer and soda, but i figure a few people might want a scotch and soda or screwdriver or something. I aim to please!
* Make sure david knows I appreciate him! He’s been super mr helpful and I really appreciate his help with this and a bunch of other stuff.
* get a bow tie for Ghengis. he’s totally handsome, he’d look great in a bow tie.
I am pretty sure this is going to win for most boring post ever.
Oh! Congratulations to Yakuza Mary on the adoption of her lovely new dog, Fletch! Good for you, Mary and Chris, now we can go to the dog park together.
Song-o-rama is tonight. If you’re in town come see David perform. Tell him to sing the damned lobster song!!!
beebo-lo-reebo!