I am probably the only north american consumer of my generation that did not watch the transformers. I just didn’t. They were all angular and angry and blowing shit up. Me? I was a Go-Bots kinda gal. Less anger, less blowing up of shit. Wednesday morning, at 9:30 AM I will be watching the transformers movie. Why? Because my boyfriend and his friends and their friends are nerds.
I don’t think I can eat popcorn at 9:30. I’m going to insist on chocolate peanuts and an ICEE. If I have to get my ass out of bed early on the greatest holiday in american history (besides arbor day and flag day) I deserve peanuts and chocolate.
To write this post I had to engage in my retarded link-finding procedure again. Delving into my stats allowed me to peruse the links and search terms again. (since I am on David’s computer I cannot post screen shots. I am retarded and have forgotten how to navigate a PC)
1) it seems that there is some link to me from somebody’s myspace blog. Weird? superweird. Who are you on myspace that has linked to me? It doesn’t show up in the url.
2) Ever since writing a post about my pendulous breasts and the bras necessary to keep them aloft about 87 of the 102 search terms involve boobs, tits, bras, or bosoms in such combinations as “granny boobs” “giant bras boobs” “huge pendulous boobs” “i dont care much for boobs” “boobs in dressing room” and “volvo convertible bra”. I hope that in some way I have been able to fulfill your boob related needs in some way.
3) “how to incapacite someone” someone went onto the internet on a quest for knowledge. They wanted to know how to how to incapacite (sic) someone. Their search led them to me. Once again, I hope that I was able to answer that question for them.
4) “hindu astronauts religion” um…ditto
5) quite a few searches for me specifically, you know, putting in my name and city and things like that. hmmmm who are you? why are you looking for me? Should I get out my hittin’ stick?
6) this is my personal favorite, “she pooped her pants”. Awesome. Who are you people? how do you end up here?
I’m off. I’ve got to ponder the religion of hindu astronauts while incapacitating people.

Chester is a dude

This weekend we are dogsitting Doti the amazing spotted puppy. Chester is in the midst of a “I am 15 months old and kind of a dick” phase right now so I thought it would be prudent to take Chester over to play with Doti to make sure everyone had the capacity to be civil to each other.
No worries. After 15 minutes of sniffing, hiding, avoiding, running away from, and ignoring, they decided to play. and play and play and play and run and play and chase and wrestle. As far as I was concerned it was all good.
Then Chester decided he’d try something new, something he tries on Maddie but rarely succeeds at. He climbed up on Doti and started humping like mad. Doti didn’t really care so much. This was pretty much the awesomest thing that could happen for Chester
Is this awesome y/n
Being a decorous person, I pulled Chester off each time I found him on her, but he didn’t mind. At one point he let out a long, whistley fart as he was humping Doti. Add some tube socks and a beer and Chester is a total dude.