Category Archives: Doogles

Bad Habit

By

The ‘this and this and completely unrelated that’ is becoming a bad habit of mine. Sorry.
Quote of the …day/week…whatever
“In the college of sex, foreplay is NOT an elective”
The QOTD ties into a conversation I was having with a friend about sex. Or more specifically, I want to write a sex column. Not a sex advice column, though I’d be pretty damned good at that, just a regular pithy bit about sex. When I tell people this they bring up Sex in the City, but I’ve only ever seen 2 episodes of that (in one they had to rent a car to go to a baby shower. Being from the midwest where you MUST own a car or die I was only bemused). The real problem is that there’s no real way to do it without offending your friends, exes, currents, parents, priests, cashiers, neighbors, bosses, dentists, delivery men, sisters, produce handlers, princes, genies, candlemakers, accountants and astronauts. Sigh.
Relatedly, has anyone seen those charts where they compare your sexual adventurousness to different kinds of ice cream starting with vanilla for the boring, missionary crowd going up to rocky road for those that leave you wide eyed and speechless. If you have, let me know.
The dog has a new game, when I sit on the couch leaning way forward, he likes to drop small toys down the back of my pants and then go after them.
HAPPY FREAKIN BIRTHDAY MARK!!!!!
Your gift hit UPS today and should be speeding it’s way to you. HOORAY!
I’m obsessively watching Babylon 5 which I borrowed from Alan who needs to update more often. Seriously, what’s the point of me haranguing you to get a damned website if you aren’t gonna update.
Have you ever considered how many old men you know who actually ARE grandpa Simpson? Off the top of my head, I can name 2 that I know.
Yeah, okay so hooray or something, that’s what’s going on.

This…that and the other

By

Just another one of those random posts
I woke up this morning feeling like I had overindulged last night. I went over the checklist of things I had to do to make me feel better, shower, coffee, french toast. Then it occurs to me that not only did I not overindulge last night, I hadn’t even partaken AND I went to bed early. Dang. All the hangover, none of the fun.
Met Owen for brunch, french toast! We caught up on our lives and mocked the horrendous toupé and ate our french toast. Good times.
Luckily, Owen was there when I went to start my car and discovered the dead battery. Dang again. He gave me a jump (with me being all ‘don’t blow my car up!!’) and I got my car over to the garage. New battery, oil change, lotsa car love.
Jen and I took the puppy to the lake and let him run around a bit. Happy puppy running in the sun, rolling in the grass, chewing on his meaty, chewy treat. Unfortunately, the grass was just wet enough that when he rolled in it he managed to get grass stains all over himself. He needs a bath now. Lucky guy.
When we put the house on the market we packed a lot of stuff thinking we’d be moving soon. We were wrong, I need my crock pot. I dug it out and now I have a lovely pot roast chugging away in the kitchen. mmm hot roast beef sandwiches.
I had a dream last night that a friend of mine and I were back in high school. We had decided to play hooky and go back to his place. He picked me up and on the way to his house he made me stop at the school and pick up my homework. Before we had any illicit school-skipping fun he insisted that we do our homework first and he was going to have to help me. I love when my dreams take my real life and make things obvious. He’s totally my smart, responsible friend.
The weird thing is that it was the first “i’m back in school” dream where I didn’t get lost in the building trying to find my locker.
This morning I almost skinned the puppy alive when I walked out of the shower and found he had chewed the shit out of my security blanket (yes, I have a security blanket, shut up or I’ll kick your ass. Hard). I didn’t kill him, but I made him stay away from me. He managed to keep a five foot distance from me at all times and whined pitifully the whole time. It’s so hard to stay mad at him.
I borrowed the Babylon 5 dvd’s from Alan. I’ve been watching obsessively. Season one was not so good, but it’s getting better. My question is, why are all space seeresses bald?
Roast is cooking. Yum.

So Many

By

I wish I had the time, the resources and the wherewithal to adopt another puppy. If I did Tank would be mine! Of course, I’d have to change his name to Kubla just to keep the theme.
I’ll wait until I move and get settled. If things go well I might get a puppy friend for Ghengis.
Happy Labor day to all who celebrate! Ghengis is celebrating by piling all his toys together and chewing everything at once. He’s a lucky puppy.

Halfway through

By

Halfway done with this holiday weekend and nothing interesting to report. I need to start participating in more interesting activities, or more specifically, activities on the ‘Interesting Scale’ that fall between the boring bits I can post here and the definitely not so boring bits that common decency prevents me from mentioning.
April moved out this weekend. I’m pretty sad about it. It was really nice to have her around. On the other hand I’ll probably cut back on my smoking (i say this knowing I have 2 cartons of cigarettes making their way over here from Sweden. Aaah the Swedes, their cigarettes are so very very cheap you can’t afford not to smoke).
An acquaintance I had not heard from in months called me up last night to say hi and tell me he missed me. Nice. It was good to hear from him, though he was terribly shy. Now I have another person on my list to see before I move.
No new pictures of Ghengis. I should get some soon. We’ve worked our way through the training basics, now we’re on to ‘no jumping’ and ‘no barking’. He’s curled up next to me, snoring, upset that I wouldn’t go back to bed with him. What kind of puppy wants to sleep late? My kind of puppy.
I have an obsession with LJGrabbers. It pulls the last 30 images posted to Livejournal. You can just sit there and reload and watch the images fly. It’s a good thing no one takes Livejournal as a cross section of society. If they did, they’d come away thinking that 90% of american society is populated by adolescent emo-goth kids who cut themselves, “are utterly alone” and wear too much make up. My advice to them (and most people I know, myself included somedays) is ‘get over yourself’.
Today, I’m off to a Twins game with Alan. He’s really good about taking me to games and then sitting there, answering all of my probably retarded questions. “How come at some games they wear one color but at other games they wear another?” “why is that an error? it looked perfectly fine to me.” “Do you want a beer? I do!”. I repay his kindness with ballpark beer and a multitude of snacks. When I get settled in after I move I’ll take him to a game at Camden Yards.
That’s about it. I need to shower and walk the dog before I go to the game. Hopefully, I can get to IKEA tonight, they’re having a bedroom sale. Woo.
ps if anyone’s doing anything interesting for labor day, give me an invite! all my plans got cancelled.