I am drained. Today has drained me. I have spent my day giving advice, listening, helping and shouldering other people’s burdens.
I do not say this in any sort of resentful way.
It is only by mere coincidence that 3 people in one day have needed help and guidance. I cannot say “no, I’ve heard my share of misery tody, call back tomorrow”.
But I am drained, completely and utterly drained. I’ve spent the day doing research, gathering numbers for assistance, trying to navigate the bewildering public assistance system so that a girl can get the help she needs. And I spent a chunk of time helping another person navigate the murky waters of family entanglements. AND I spent the day teaching someone about nutrition (to be fair, this was less draining).
In regards to one of the girls I dealt with today, someone asked me why I was doing this. They said “you know you can’t save her, right?”. You know, I don’t know that for sure. I don’t know the outcome of this situation at all, but I also know that I cannot in good conscience assess a situation until I’ve entered into it.
I know that in my own heart, to walk away from someone who needs help of this magnitude is a moral black hole. Not everyone can be saved, I know this keenly, but I know that sometimes people CAN be saved and I know this personally.
I do not give more than I can stand to lose, this isn’t about handing out cash, this is about giving someone a shoulder and some direction and support. This is letting someone know that there ARE people in this world who will help you and they will not attach a price tag.
Incidentally, if you are in the twin cities area and you have anything that would be of use to a 10 month old baby please contact me so we can work something out. Clothes, toys, supplies, these would all be greatly appreciated and put to good use.

Today I saw a headline that made me laugh ut loud. I’ll never reveal to anyone this headline because it was actually a very bad thing, but for a brief moment, everything that is snarky and mean and cynical just flew forward and I laughed.
Part of this is the fault of the headline writer, it was crafted in such a way to feel like a headline straight out of the Onion.
But let’s be real here, I can’t blame the hacks at cnn.com, the responsibility lies within me. I laughed. I laughed because I thought it was funny and I’m laughing right now thinking about it. But I’ll never tell.
And, to do a complete 180…
I fucking hate Anthony Bourdain. I really do. I cannot stand him. I hate him more than Emeril. I think he’s a jackass and a shit. The entire premise of his celebrity is the fact that he smokes and scowls and wears jeans and is a complete jackass. You know how much I despise Emeril, right??? RIGHT???? Well I would far rather spend an hour with Emeril pretending to be nice than 12 seconds with Anthony Bourdain. I hate him.
Phew, okay, that felt better.

Look, all I’m saying is that before the weight of wind up, spring-loaded tchotchkes and tinny music crushes you, before the vacuum of suburban troglodytia devours your soul, before the mall of america consumes the last breath of good in you…YOU SHOULD HAVE SOME FUN.
Lilo and Stitch, Monter’s Inc, a bucket of chicken and popcorn. I won’t even make you eat your vegetables! Why would you say no to that? Why would you even take time to consider?
An entire evening of dog farts, jokes at your expense and heartburn!!!
Come on, you know that deep down inside you love it.
Forever and Always
Heather
Associate Vice President of Cool

Last week everyone said “It’s spring! SPRING!!! nothing bad can happen anymore!!!” and then I got to say, “no, no, we have one more blizzard. Trust me. That’s how minnesota works. One more blizzard in march during the high school boy’s basketball championship…”. It was a week early, but what are you gonna do?
What you’re going to do is pile 87 inches of snow off your car and make the sloooow bumpy ride to work. Sadly, no one was there who cared that I made it to work on time in these treacherous conditions. No one.
Okay, so…PICTURES. Let’s go.
David gets home every day around 3:30 and I get home around 5. The dogs go crazy when either of us gets home but when David gets home that signals to them that the time of waiting must begin. They get in their positions and wait and wait and…wait. For 90 minutes they sit there and wait for me. Cute, huh? Also a little crazy.
And we have pictures from David’s bowling birthday party. I discovered that when You take pictures when the cosmic bowling lights are on it makes everyone take on a freakish red glow. I tried to fix it…but you know, we still look like the deamon ghouls that we are. Bowling alley! We were at Memory Lanes (formerly Stardust Lanes), they remodelled and got expensive BUT they feature things like real food and non-surly staff. This is a bonus. David is teaching us something about bowling, I think. Here areThe Sisters (and brother in law), Mary Alice, Julie and Ryan. And here I am hugging Anna who is leaving my department because she somehow thinks glory can be found in a music box store at the mall of america. HA!
And finally, nothing at all cures the blues faster than playing in the snow with a dog that is shorter than the snowdrifts.
Look
at
these
and
smile
That’s all the photos I have right now. I have a bunch to use in the daily photo and soon I will be back on track with that. Have a loaf of sesame semolina bread in the machine right now. Yay. To all you, happy snow!