Yesterday, Patti gave me a giant chocolate chip cookie which I brought home to eat when I was feeling better. I took it out of my purse and put it up before I left for dinner. Maddie still managed to find it and eat it.
I know it was Maddie because I found the wrapper on her dog bed, Ghengis hides his treats in other places.
You kow how people are saying “you can only yell at a dog WHILE they are doing something bad”? The reasoning being that they forget easily and if they aren’t doing the thing you are yelling at them for (like eating the cookie) they will be confused about why you are yelling at them. That’s not as true as you might think. I found the cookie wrapper on Maddie’s bed and held it up. She had total guilt face. I just stood there looking at her. Normally when I do that she comes up to me for a hug. Not this time. She tried to hide under the coffee table, then she jumped up on the sofa and hid her face in the cushions. I walked up her her and she totally rolled on her back, begging for forgiveness.
I told her to not eat my cookies!
Later that night she got an upset belly. Luckily, she didn’t throw up on the bed or anything.
At 2 in the morning I found myself holding her giant head in my arms as we lay in bed together. I rubbed her rumbling belly and sang the Hippo Head Jones song and the Beautiful Boombalatty song. Then I made up an “Amazing Adventures of Hippo Head Jones and Crocodile Bob” story for her, this time about how they came across a village in the jungle and the villagers were all nice to them and everything, but they had a hut that was all locked up. The hut smelled so good, they really wanted to go in there. That night they snuck into the hut and found big piles of something so tasty! Hippo Head Jones and Crocodile Bob ate and ate and ate and the next morning the villagers chased them away for eating all the fertilizer for their manioc fields. And all the next day, Hippo Head Jones and Crocodile Bob sat in their little blue boat getting sick and farting on each other.
Lesson learned? Naw, she’ll eat every cookie she finds forever.