Yesterday, I totally parallel parked all by myself! Those who know me know of my issues with depth perception and my total retardation when it comes to spatial relationships (and spazzy relationships!) so i tend to avoid the parallel parking at all costs, I’ve even been known to stop in the middle of parallel parking, get out of the car and make the passenger finish the job.
This is how much I suck at it.
Yesterday I had to run to the grocery store to get the food to feed the burning need to cook everything in sight and when I got back I realized that someone was parked behind David, the space in front of him was open (that’s where I WAS parked when I left) and John’s car was still in the space in front. Fuck it, I decided to try.
I sat quietly, gathered my feng chi whatever, calmly thought it out and did it. and it worked.
probably because the spot was like 87 feet long, but still, I didn’t park on the other block.
Of course, if I were able to park in my garage this would be a non-issue but that’s another post for another time…
also…unrelatedly…batterfried okra is very VERY reminiscent of healthy tater tots. Just saying.
follow your dreams
man, this has been a crazy weekend at the stove. Crazy.
Saturday night I finally got over my aversion to spaghetti squash! I sauteed kale, fennel bulb and radicchio in the wok and added about half the spaghetti squash. Then orange juice, lime juice and garlic, cooked until the liquid was gone. Finished with tamari and sesame oil. Much better than I would have expected.
Then I baked up a loaf of honey graham bread and we ate that while watching the seminal 80’s post-nuclear-apocalypse movie, The Day After. What I learned about nuclear war is that within 120 hours after a giant 300 bomb attack on the US everyone will turn into a dirty, mute hippy. Seriously, no doubt, there’s a giant war and everyone suddenly looks like a fithly Cheech or Chong but instead of smokin’ it up and laughing they end up staring dazedly off into the distance and having their skin fall off.
Yeah, so…
Last night I dreamed about making brownies no less than 3 times! 3 times! So, if I know anything it’s that you must always follow your dreams. First thing this morning (after getting coffee then going BACK to the coffee shop so the coffee chica culd meet ghengis) I made brownies with toasted pecans. This is the only brownie recipe I really like, not cakey, gooey and with the crispy top. It’s an old, handwritten recipe, I think it’s my ex’s grandmother’s recipe, I’m not sure. I don’t ever want to lose it even if it does make me a little sad every time I make it.
Also it makes me very happy to eat good brownies.
So yeah, if you dream about brownies, follow that dream. Follow your dreams. However, if you dream about having dirty dirty orgies with co-workers past and present, don’t follow that dream.
It didn’t end with the brownies, though. I had the bread machine whip up a pizza crust which I divided in half and rolled out. Each circle was put in a pie plate, docked and baked for ten minutes. I mixed together spinach, feta, dill, garlic and two eggs and threw that in one pie shell. Then I mixed up zucchini, kale, carrots and broccoli with ricotta, fresh mozzarella, parmesan, herbs and an egg. Tossed that in a shell, covered it in garlicky pasta sauce and fresh mozzarella. Baked them both for about 40 minutes. These were not for dinner, these were for lunches this week.
Then I made a loaf of focaccia.
THEN
(yeah, i kept cooking)
For dinner I batter fried okra for the first time. It turned out pretty well, if I do say so. It needs a little more seasoning (I used curry) but it was not slimy. I also made curried sweet potato latkes and a mixed green salad with a sesame/champaigne vinaigrette.
I’m tired! I was totally crazy for the cooking all day and it felt good to be so productive. Not just productive, but meaningfully so, I have enough food in the fridge to cover lunches for most of the week. Good food, not just sodium laden pre-packaged food. Lunches are made with love!!!
How was your weekend?
Drained
I am drained. Today has drained me. I have spent my day giving advice, listening, helping and shouldering other people’s burdens.
I do not say this in any sort of resentful way.
It is only by mere coincidence that 3 people in one day have needed help and guidance. I cannot say “no, I’ve heard my share of misery tody, call back tomorrow”.
But I am drained, completely and utterly drained. I’ve spent the day doing research, gathering numbers for assistance, trying to navigate the bewildering public assistance system so that a girl can get the help she needs. And I spent a chunk of time helping another person navigate the murky waters of family entanglements. AND I spent the day teaching someone about nutrition (to be fair, this was less draining).
In regards to one of the girls I dealt with today, someone asked me why I was doing this. They said “you know you can’t save her, right?”. You know, I don’t know that for sure. I don’t know the outcome of this situation at all, but I also know that I cannot in good conscience assess a situation until I’ve entered into it.
I know that in my own heart, to walk away from someone who needs help of this magnitude is a moral black hole. Not everyone can be saved, I know this keenly, but I know that sometimes people CAN be saved and I know this personally.
I do not give more than I can stand to lose, this isn’t about handing out cash, this is about giving someone a shoulder and some direction and support. This is letting someone know that there ARE people in this world who will help you and they will not attach a price tag.
Incidentally, if you are in the twin cities area and you have anything that would be of use to a 10 month old baby please contact me so we can work something out. Clothes, toys, supplies, these would all be greatly appreciated and put to good use.
chica mala
Today I saw a headline that made me laugh ut loud. I’ll never reveal to anyone this headline because it was actually a very bad thing, but for a brief moment, everything that is snarky and mean and cynical just flew forward and I laughed.
Part of this is the fault of the headline writer, it was crafted in such a way to feel like a headline straight out of the Onion.
But let’s be real here, I can’t blame the hacks at cnn.com, the responsibility lies within me. I laughed. I laughed because I thought it was funny and I’m laughing right now thinking about it. But I’ll never tell.
And, to do a complete 180…
I fucking hate Anthony Bourdain. I really do. I cannot stand him. I hate him more than Emeril. I think he’s a jackass and a shit. The entire premise of his celebrity is the fact that he smokes and scowls and wears jeans and is a complete jackass. You know how much I despise Emeril, right??? RIGHT???? Well I would far rather spend an hour with Emeril pretending to be nice than 12 seconds with Anthony Bourdain. I hate him.
Phew, okay, that felt better.
Dear anna
Look, all I’m saying is that before the weight of wind up, spring-loaded tchotchkes and tinny music crushes you, before the vacuum of suburban troglodytia devours your soul, before the mall of america consumes the last breath of good in you…YOU SHOULD HAVE SOME FUN.
Lilo and Stitch, Monter’s Inc, a bucket of chicken and popcorn. I won’t even make you eat your vegetables! Why would you say no to that? Why would you even take time to consider?
An entire evening of dog farts, jokes at your expense and heartburn!!!
Come on, you know that deep down inside you love it.
Forever and Always
Heather
Associate Vice President of Cool