So, dang, yo! It was a busy busy busy weekend.
Friday: Friday was not so interesting, it consisted of a bit of cleaning, pizza eating, goofmobiling and playing with the dog.
Saturday: The day started with the realtor coming out to assess things so that maybe the house will sell. Exciting? Not as exciting as putting squirrels in your pants for the purposes of gambling, but not bad.
(unrelatedly, the dog ate my DVD remote. I didn’t think much of it until I went and put Season 5 of the Simpsons in there. There is no scroll button on the front of my dvd player so I can’t scroll through menus of any sort. This isn’t a big deal except on episodic dvd’s like the Simpsons where you want to scroll through the list and pick the option “Play all without commentary”. Essentially, I can the first episode of any of the dvds. Also, I can’t turn on the subtitles, change to widescreen format or watch the extra footage on any of my dvd’s. I’m pretty sure that Ghengis is getting a universal remote for his birthday and that universal remote will be used by me or i will beat his puppy ass into the ground.)
After the realtor left, David made me breakfast (scrambled eggs with spinach, tomatoes and cheese) then he and I settled in for some hardcore coloring in Spongebob coloring books (WTF did you think I was gonna say? We already determined that banana stretching is only an illusion!). David is way more precise about his coloring than I am. I think I completed 4 pages by the time he was done with his first one. I totally missed coloring! We just kept the crayons and books on the table all weekend and I would go color now and then. It’s good for the soul.
(My sister gave me a Love Sack (shut up, pervert). The Love Sack is a gigantic bean bag monstrosity made for two people to sit on. Gigantic isn’t quite the word I’m looking for…remember when Jabba got Leia in that tarty little outfit? Yeah, pretend I’m the Weeble version of Leia and the Love Sack is Jabba without the tongue or access to a pit of doom. I had to hire a team of oxen to move it around my house.)
Then David and I curled up on the Love Sack (did I tell you about this? I think I did, perhaps in an aside somewhere else in this post, like right above this) and watched ‘Tampopo’. The movie made me hungry for Japanese noodles so I pitched myself to the floor and yelled until David took me out for noodles (or maybe I asked and he agreed, the details get hazy). After dinner we ventured over to see ‘I <3 Huckabees' at the cheapy theatre. Apparently every newspaper writer ever announced Huckabees to be their all time favorite movie or something. They all made this announcement on the same day so everyone on the planet went to go see this movie that night. No mind, we got in, we loved it, we will probably go see it again to pick up on anything we missed.
(if anyone wants to buy me a late christmas present, a timely MLK jr present or and early birthday present, Napoleon Dynamite is out on dvd. Just a thought)
Sunday: I woke up early with an urge to move stirring in my heart (I thought I was dying or something, it just felt so weird to have...motivation on a sunday morning). I got up, made coffee instead of sending the boy out to get some for me, I made breakfast (I think I might have perfected my pancake recipe. I used to hate pancakes and I've come to realize that I don't hate pancakes, i hate Bisquick pancakes and I hate buttermilk pancakes. I love regular pancakes, especially regular pancakes with cinnamon, cardamom, ginger and orange zest in them. Not a lot, just a little, just enough to hint at something more interesting than pancakes). I woke David up with some coffee (I know! I actually MADE the coffe myself. It was too strong or something, but I thought it was okay), hustled his butt to the table for breakfast, even gave the dog a pancake (sans syrup) to bribe him to behave himself.
(My good pal, Ethan, sent me hardcore full spectrum light bulbs. Not the cheapo full spectrums you get at the hardware store for a dollar but the ones so bright that they have the same color as sunlight and they make your house look like it is full of space ships when you see them from the outside. These bulbs have both science and magic in them!)
I did 2 loads of dishes, 5 loads of laundry, colored 4 pictures, watched two movies, made Indian spiced basmati rice, made the bed, entertained the boy and talked on the phone. You really have no choice but to like a guy who reads you Grimm's Fairytales while you color in coloring books.
I love these rambling, pointless posts. Fun to write, don't mean anything.
Also, someone just described the Monte Cristo sandwich as 'The dessert meatwich'.
Category Archives: Doogles
And a good day to you, sir
Happy holidays people! This is my crazy post of the season. I’ve been crazy busy all week shopping, hanging out with people and whatnot.
* First off, I got almost all my Christmas shopping done. I promised people that if they did not have an Amazon wishlist they would not get anything. I came through though and managed to get things for people! (see how I make myself out to be a hero? I do this because it’s true, I am a hero. A great big sparkly hero). I even broke down and bought wrapping paper instead of gift bags. I got dinosaur wrapping paper and not Santa paper, but I’m sure you understand. Hell, I even got little mini bottles of bubbles to tie on the packages. I’m swell.
* Nothing upsets a puppy more than seeing things that are obviously for him getting covered in paper and tape. Yes, I bought gifts for the dog and wrapped them for him. He’ll get to unwrap his gifts and everything.
* I am heading up to my mom’s for Christmas this weekend and in true-to-me fashion, I am completely unprepared to be away from home. I need to clean, do laundry, finish wrapping presents and go to urgent care to see if the swelling in my throat, glands and ear is the result of a treatable bacterial infection (strep) or sux-o-matic viral infection (flu). If treatable I need to get antibiotics now because…
* I go to my mom’s on friday, come back sunday and fly out to New Orleans on Monday leaving me no time to get to a doctor if I need one. Also, I want to get this treated ASAP because…
* I’m going to New Orleans to spend a week with the boy and his family. Meeting the parents is kinda nervewracking. Ick. BUT I will be in New Orleans and I will go the aquarium and eat good food and finally see the boy after missing him all week. Also, the weather will be warmer than this negative degrees of cold crap.
* Stupid fucking cold weather, I hate you.
* Peanut butter cookies kick ass. Homemade peanut butter cookies made by a coworker as a bribe for a favor are all the sweeter.
* I have a chuck roast simmering away in my special secret chili spices at home right now. I haven’t made chili in a long time, I’m kind of excited about this. The leftovers will have to be taken by Alan as I will not be home for a week starting tomorrow.
* Last Sunday I went grocery shopping and after putting everything away I realized that I was not going to be home all this week for dinner (with the exception of chili night tonight) and I would not be able to eat this food. My friends will be getting lots of perishable groceries.
* The actual DAY of Christmas never has that much significance to me. People keep saying ‘3 more days! Aren’t you excited??’. Well, honestly, no. With the various and sundry Christmas dinners and celebrations spread out between the divorced parents, friends, other families and whatnot, the actual DAY of Christmas, 12/25, gets a little lost. It’s cool actually, because I have a whole month of getting to celebrate instead of concentrating it all on one day.
* For the first time in YEARS my nails are chewed. I haven’t chewed my nails in the longest time. I sort of nibble on them occasionally, or I gnaw on my thumbnail, but I never chew them in such a way that my nails look short and chewed on. I think the combination of really cold, dry weather combined with holiday madness has conspired to make my hands look like those of a 14 year old emo girl.
* Yeah, I’ve rambled on enough. People, you have yourselves a happy happy holiday week. Eat a lot, hug a lot, hump a lot if you have someone or something to hump, find one person and forgive them, eat some fruitcake to remind yourself that this is the worst thing you could possibly eat, bundle up and enjoy the ride.
Dear You
Dammit, i’d finally gotten used to having someone around, finally gotten used to sharing my time and interests again. I’d finally found someone with the same goofy interests in dinosaurs and movies and my dog.
Dammit, I’d gotten used to having you around and now you go on vacation? Dork. I miss you. I mean the dog is warm and all, but he doesn’t cuddle. And the dog is fun and all, but he doesn’t pick me up and carry me around. The dog has DOES have a firm, proud buttocks, but…yeah well, you know.
I miss you, but I’ll see you in a week, baby.
xoh
Here we go
Woo, yeah so it’s been busy busy, time for the patented (and highly fascinating) bulleted list…
* Yeah, the rumours are true. His name is David.
* Going to New Orleans for the week after Christmas. Looking forward to good food, the aquarium, warm weather, all that good stuff.
* You can’t use an iPod with gloves on. I didn’t know this. Something about making a circuit with the buttons, you need fleshy contact. On very cold mornings it is not uncommon to see me licking the buttons on my iPod.
* I did not leave the house this weekend. I went out briefly so the dog could pee and I could smoke but I went nowhere. Friday night I relaxed in a bubble bath with a bottle of wine while I waited for the boy. Saturday i made rack of lamb for dinner with the boy and my hairdresser. Sunday was all about chilling and watching movies. No need to leave. Excellent.
* People are still telling me I look like I’ve lost weight, i still maintain that without evidence of a massive tumor or tapeworm it can’t be possible.
* Ghengis is being boarded for the first time (no, not ‘boarded by aliens’ but in a kennel). He’s at that age where he’s all puppy craziness and he’s full size and he is without adult dog control. He’ll be staying at a pretty nice kennel for the week I am in New Orleans. This will take the pressure off my dad to watch him.
* I need to finish Christmas shopping. Better hope you have an amazon wishlist because I’m too damned busy to care.
* Speaking of Christmas, this is the first Christmas in a long time without any decorations and I’m pretty okay with that. I was never much of a Christmas person, I prefer Thanksgiving to all other holidays, but I did the Christmas thing every year and it was kind of fun. In the ‘Official Division of Community Property’ I let Jen take the Christmas stuff as it was definitely more her thing than mine. No tree, no ornaments, no decorations and I’m actually pretty happy with that. I think I’ll take a couple years off Christmas and see what happens. Sadly, this DOES mean that I’m not sending out Christmas cards this year. So if you normally got a card from me, you probably won’t this year. It’s not that I don’t care, but…you know.
* Saw Garden State last night. Not a bad movie, felt like if he had waited 5 years to write it and make it the movie would have felt a little more cohesive. I was struck at the end by the falling in love bit. How can you fall in love with someone in 4 days? I’ll admit that i tend to be more cynic than romantic, but still, 4 days is an awful short time, that’s hardly love.
* I’ve said it before and I will say it again, I love my hairdresser with all the dirtiness in the world. When I say, “I’m thinking of going with blue next time” he immediately describes how we will do icy blue hair with dark blue highlights. Love him.
* I can not for the life of me ever remember my log in names or passwords for my credit card’s websites so i can pay them online. Every account I have requires 4 or 5 attempts with various combinations of log ins and passwords. The problem with (or the saving grace depending on how you look at it) bank and credit card sites is that they have slightly more stringent requirements for log in names and passwords. I can’t just use my standard log ins because I need to have passwords be longer than usual and I have to include a number in there somewhere. I know, I do appreciate that it is harder to log in to than say your standard internet forum, but still…I’m not smart enough to remember this shit!
until next time, folks. I hope to come up with something more interesting. I have photos that need to be posted, I’ll try to get those up here.
Could I be more of a spaz??
My day is all about spazziness. I hate it, but I’m also a little charmed by it. Is it wrong to be charmed by your own self? I’m not sure if I knew me if I would be irritated or completely charmed by me. I’m hoping for charmed since I am convinced I am the most charming person you know.
I oversleep this morning, which I hate to do because it just eats into my day. Luckily, it wasn’t so bad because of the time change. It was only 9:30 in real life. I keep trying to get things done, but I can’t. I’m just moving too slow.
I grab the dog and a cigarette and the phone and head outside to clear my head. I call David because he seems like the most willing victim and I sort of just ramble on and on to him about nothing. In the middle of the conversation the dog sees a rabbit in the back yard and takes off after it. The hand holding the leash is slammed mercilessly into the stair railing. Twice.
I’m yelling and crying into the phone, my hand is going numb and I am unable to form the fist I need to punch the shit out of the dog. Painful bruise forming as I type this.
I decide I need some breakfast and order David out of bed. I think to myself “I need to be over at my dad’s at 2:30 for Kit’s birthday party, I shouldn’t be late, but I’ll bring her present anyway”. Oh, yeah, it’s like 12:30, there’s no way I’ll be late! Not at all.
We head over to Victor’s 1959 cafe for plantain omelets but the wait looks to be about 2 weeks long. Dang. So over to Maria’s Colombian Cafe for plantain pancakes and omelets with refried beans! Of course everything is taking longer than expected because I am completely incapable of judging time and distance. I suck, but I drank a metric buttload of coffee (a metric buttload is .782 imperial buttloads, fyi)
At 2:20 my sister calls to say “where are you??”. It’s a legitimate question since the cake and ice cream is actually at 2 and not 2:30. Now I double suck, because not only was I going to be late, but now I am going to be ultra late.
Drop David off, head out in a blaze of flaky lateness and get over to my dad’s an hour late.
Is it wrong that my dad has really hot friends? This is the second time I’ve met one of my dad’s friends and he was way hot. What’s up with that? What’s up with my dad hanging out with guys close enough to my age to still be hot?
Good thing I brought Kit’s present with, that would have been embarassing. Coffee, tart, presents and trying not to flirt with my dad’s friend.
Home again. Had to carve the pumpkin (it’s a total lame carving job, but whatever), then get the candy ready and lure the runaway dog inside with a pig ear.
Time to make dinner. Huzzah.