Proof that I am insane or retarded

1) some jackass used my phone over the weekend while wearing a thick, gluey paste of cologne. Everything at my desk reeks of cheap, drugstore cologne. It’s giving me a headache and making my belly woogly
2) it is 77 degrees and sunny
3) my boss is not here all week
Seriously, what’s wrong with me? I should have left around 9:15 this morning. I should have come in, looked around for 12 seconds and then left. I’m sitting here advising every other person I know to have a meeting “off campus”. Is it loyalty to my job? Laziness to the point of not being able to stand up and leave? Stupidity?
I don’t know.