three) Be careful when applying fake eyelash adhesive to your eye. Mishaps including, but not limited to can include gluing your eye shut, gluing your lid open, burning the shit out of your eye. On the other hand, I’m keen on the glitter.
II) Finally saw “Punch Drunk Love” all the way through. Loved it for all it’s quirky WTDedness.
Uno) Everyday I see things I wish I could photograph but then they’re lost. They’re the visual ephemera of my day. here…gone…no record of them ever existing. The dogs are lying together right now in a pose that would kill you for how cute they are. To get my camera would distract them and the shot would be lost. Maddie is sleeping on my, Ghengis is curled against her watching David put dinner away. Gone..
try to remember things, people, remember that Lena Leonard was in 206…

So I was desperately searching Photoshop for a specific feature that I know should be in there, I want it to constrain my crop to a ratio equivilent to 4×6. I know it has to be in there but I can’t find it. The pictures my camera takes are not to the same height/width ratio as the 4×6 photo paper that I have which means either the top gets cut off or there is a white border on the sides. I accept that cropping with have to occcur, I just want to be able to control what gets cropped. Also, I don’t always want the entire picture, I just want a part of it but I still want that part to fit on 4×6 paper.
Can’t find it, no one knows how except to crop pixel by pixel until it fits. People suggest downloading this software or that software, but I don’t want different software, I don’t want to have to learn something new (and that smug “meh meh meh meh my software is so l33t I could kill 10 pumas with it” attitude makes me want to steal your software and shoot it in the soul. If it had one.)
So I do that and another curious thing happens. I open a photo, crop the top edge off, save it and print it and the color quality goes to hell. I can’t figure it out. I didn’t do anything to the photo except crop the top off and suddenly my sunset is printing up all shitty.
Sigh.
So I do more searching and guess what I find? iPhoto has cropping constraints! What the hell, why didnt I notice this before (because I am retarded as highlighted by my photoshop follies). iPhoto gives you either a 4×6 frame to move about on your photo or keeps your custom crop box to the right ratio. Simple! and the quality does not degrade in any way when you print them.
I’m a printing fool. I’ve filled all but two of my picture frames! I need to get more. I need to fill my house with pictures. I need to resist the urge to print every picture of the dogs that i have!
And so, after printing like a maniac we got ready and headed over to the 14th anniversary extravaganza for Balls Cabaret which is the longest continuously running midnight cabaret or something like that. If they had a website I’d link to that. We go there semi-regularly and last night was truly one of the best times all around. There was partial nudity, there was barry manilow, there was full frontal nudity, there was humor, hitler, best friend fucking and loads of aftershow chocolate and cake. Someday we’ll get David back up there on that stage (though, I mentioned earlier he’s been doing Song-o-Rama on Wednesdays and I’m pretty happy about that. Hey, David, finish the lobster song!)
Halfway through the show at Balls I felt the old familiar pain in my back and this morning woke up with my good friend Mr Bladder Infection pounding away at my kidneys and bladder.
Birthday breakfast with my sister and then a trip to urgent care. My sister got a combo Christmas/Birthday present but I didn’t want her to feel all forgotten or anything so I gave her the one present that anybody would want, A framed photo of my dogs. Oh yeah! Ghengis and Maddie together for her to proudly display.
I was in pain and cranky at breakfast, not very good company at all. Sorry, April, I’ll make it up to you.
Urgent care was completely unbusy and I was in and out of there with antibiotics in hand in no time (well, ‘no time’ in a sort of Einsteinian relative sort of way, David was probably pretty bored and he probably felt like it took forever. he’s a good chochobo though, and we did the crossword puzzle while we waited.)
I got home thinking I’d be lazy and chill for the rest of the day but I had a surprising amount of energy so i popped some alleve and vacuumed twice (I love my Dyson vacuum, have I mentioned that lately) and then decided that I did have enough energy to steam clean the carpets.
First of all, the steam cleaner will not remove blood from the carpet. This is a pain. Secondly, I was struck by the thought the list of people I could make in my mind that would stop me part way through the process and tell me the ‘right’ way to do it. They’d tell me to stop being so random, to go from one end of the place to the other, to stop walking over the spots I had already cleaned…to work in a fucking pattern. You know what? I didn’t care. The best thing about my life is that I get to live it. I did this totally messed up, random carpet cleaning and it worked and my carpets are clean and they look better and I didn’t get bored while doing it.
Of course how could i get bored when the mixer mechanism that attaches to the sink started leaking without me noticing and the water ran down the hose onto the floor and flooded the kitchen and leaked into the basement? Aaaah, good times. Cleaning that up make my kitchen floor the cleanest it has been in a long time, though so that’s a good thing.
Then I cleaned the bathroom all over and admonished David to keep it clean (which is not a reflection of his habits, he’s not messy, just a stated rule that no one can make the bathroom messy until after the party).
Then I wrote this.
And now this chochobo is going to wander into the kitchen to stuff food in her mouth as she hasn’t eaten since breakfast and the antibiotics make her woozily.
bolochobo out!