Category Archives: Craftin

Hookers of the world! UNITE!

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Today is the first day of the Stitch Stirrer plan to build the crochet army! Phase one is always propaganda, so watch out, bizhitchies! The flaming hooks of justice will soon be flying oner a town near you (perhaps joining Ravelry and meeting other crocheters and feeling all empowered isn’t the healthiest thing for my obsessive side).
Todays Theme: Limericks!
There once was a girl with a hook
For patterns she’d nowhere to look
Being quite the slattern
She booked flight to Saturn
Where she lived by hook or by crook
There once was a yarn store in town
That oft made all the hookers frown
With the matter in hand
They formed an angry band
But stopped before the place burned down
Once was a girl with a lizard
That could not survive a blizzard
She hooked up a sweater
He acted no better
But she felt herself a wizard
Okay, that’s enough pain from me!

happy happy happy

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oh my god! It’s the happiest game ever! Go there and play a happy game and smile.
Try all the Orisinal Games. All of them are super cute, some are more frustrating than others. It’s the thing to do when Ravelry is going oh so super slow!
It’s a good stress reliever! Today I finished most of the first sleeve on my cardigan and I tried it on and OH! I overestimated how fat my arm was. PZANG! Had to pull out the entire sleeve and then close the armhole a little and then recalculate the decreases! I probably won’t have it done by tomorrow and I can’t start any new projects until I finish a project.
I also started to make a loaf of molasses oat bread and didn’t stop to check if I had any molasses left. Molasses is something you never buy, it’s just always up there in the cupboard, it’s label aging away. I actually have to buy molasses on occasion since I like to make the molasses oat bread. I subbed brown sugar. Also added wheat germ and flax seed to give it a hippie feel. Ate it with the homemade wild blue buddy berry blueberry jam (made from the blueberries I picked in the BWCA. It’s really awesome. No, you can’t have any. I’m just telling you about it because I’m an asshole.).
Also, you know what’s good on everything (except fruit, ironically)? Tajin!

This is the thing that is thing-like

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It’s 6:30pm and I have only consumed one apple and one americano. This has left me a little cranky and a tad irritable. Of course, the obvious solution is to eat something, but you know….
Actually, I’ve been forgetting to eat more and more often lately. So far my pants show no visible benefit to this new regime of coffee, carrots and utter forgetfulness.
In other (ravelry) related news (otherwise known as ‘how I spent my money’)
I am 3/4 of the way done with the Spiderweb Cardigan. I’m loving it, but I am hating my inability to put together an non-retarded seam. I made it in a light lime green. Weird? I don’t know, we’ll see.
I’m also working on my first of too many Pirate Hats. Since the pattern is in graph form it was too easy to convert to crochet after finding the right gauge and all. It whips up fairly easily, unless you aren’t paying attention and forget that it’s TWO decreases per iteration and then you have to rip out the top when you realize that it just doesn’t seem to be closing up properly. Oh well, after the first one things always get better.
I picked up fiberfill so I could recommence with the weird dinosaur/prehistoric animal project. I found a pattern that would work perfectly for either an ammonite or orthocerus depending on how you finish it. Someone needs to have a nerd baby.
After my work on the pirate hats I decided that I could probably handle Fair Isle/Shetland/Norwegian patterns. I bought some wool yarn and I am going to make a felted purse using a repeated Norwegian chart. I cannot start that until I finish off a few things first.
I also picked up the yarn to do this pattern. I’m not sure why I like it so much (besides the fact that the pattern is dead easy). Everyone else gives me very guarded responses when i ask their opinions. I’ll make it. If you later see a horrid big cowl sweater in a heather rose color at the Goodwill, you know what happened.
I need to go add arms to my cardigan and pull out a row of the pirate hat.
ps I wrote this post with my T key popped off. I hate when it does that.

It’s not that I don’t love you….

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It’s just that I love Ravelry a little more than you right now….
I’m just kidding. Suckers
Anyway, yeah, I’m all over Ravelry like the poopsmith on your droppings. Not only does it help me organize my projects, I can link to all kinds of things and get project ideas and I can talk to other crocheters!! I can spend time talking to other crocheters! Do you know what this means? This means I can be involved in a conversation about the yarn arts and not sit and listen to “knit knit knit knit we all knit knit knit why don’t you knit”
I found a place where I belong!!!
But I’m not all gin and roses, oh no! Today, lets balance the love with a little hate. Let me talk about the bands or musicians that I can’t stand! Having set up Pandora recently I’ve discovered that there is a whole world of crappy music just waiting for me (and a tiny island nation of good music).
1) Polyphonic Spree. Gimmicky gimmickness with a thick syrup of gimmick all over it. Why do you need 23 fucking people in the group? Why? Because you need a gimmick! Take off the robes, stop pretending to be all peace and love and go get punched in the face. 23 people? Come on, the only reason why you have 23 people in your group is because you know I’ll get tired after punching 16 or 17 of you and you’re drawing straws. YOU ARE ALL A BUNCH OF WIENERS!!!
2) Yo La Tengo. Why don’t we all wear some earth tones, make some pleasant mellow music and then take a break to drink this special free trade organic tibetan herbal tea harvested by buddhist monks so devout they don’t actually breath. You guys are also wieners but if I call you wieners you will probably just offer me some tea.
3) John Mayer. Long time readers already know of my deep seated hatred of John Mayer and his predilection for raping simile and metaphor. John Mayer, you are NOT a wiener, you are a wiener stain.
Dang, I’d love to share more, but I’m still happy from Ravelry. Ha!