Dear April

I’m sitting at home thinking dirty thoughts about you. Not just regular dirty thoughts, but really deep down, butt grindin dirty thoughts. That’s right, April, I’m thinking things that would make a Bangkok hooker cringe and I’m thinking these things about you.
Right now.
Have fun at work and tell that one guy he never gave me any cookies and tell the other guy he never made me any lemon bars.
Also, I miss you.