Yeah, I was all grumpy and then there were the spots in my left eye….

I have the textbook symptoms for Posterior Vitreous Detachment. I went to the emergency room, mostly it was okay but the doctor was crabby and exhausted and really didn’t want to take me seriously (yeah, you’ll fucking take it seriously when my eyeball explodes!). But he got me an emergency referral to an ophthalmologist for Tuesday so at least I’ll get to see someone who has actually heard the term Posterior Vitreous Detachment!
But this is the awesomeness (yay! my eyeball!). I was all grumpy and I was on Ravelry complaining about this damned stupid cold that I thought had gone away and then came back and it was making me feel exhausted and tired and full of phlegm and on top of everything else I have these two spots in the vision of my left eye that won’t go away and are right in the middle of what I see! And Ravelry being the awesomeness that it is, someone noticed this and she is a doctor and she pointed out that this wasn’t just some irritation with getting older but an actual problem that needed to be dealt with!
I would have never known and I would be on here all grumblepots and in three days my eye would explode or something.
I imagine that the process of my retina detaching is very much like like my eyeball exploding or my eyeball just popping out of my head.
Awesome.
You know what isn’t awesome? Forms of treatment for this.

1) The more I watch my sister plan her wedding the more I’m convinced to avoid the entire mess all together. Holy crap. HOLY CRAP! it’s like it never ends! So much for the “happiest day”! It’s like twelve pounds of stress in a sandwich baggie! Fuck flowers, fuck themes, fuck guest lists. I’m eloping to the moon. I don’t know man, I start doing a cost/benefit ratio and suddenly I’m seeing a whole lot of effort and headache in exchange for some photos and cake. I can do photos and cake on my own without that headache!
BUT as my sister’s maid of honor I have sworn an oath to uphold any decision she makes. I have sworn to be the asspabst that makes sure she gets what she wants. I am not above slipping atavan into the ham salad if it calms everyone down. Also, I promised her I would put a “kick me” sign on her ass as she reaches the altar.
2) Emily came back to MCAD!!! Well not back to MCAD proper but she’s in the movie filming on campus. Man, sometimes you just don’t realize how much you miss someone til they come back.
3) Today I helped Owen make chili. I emailed him lots of instructions and he repaid me with a bowl of awesome chili.
4)
5) Echidnas are AWESOME

So we joined the Y a few weeks ago and when I tell people it’s all “oooh gonna lose weight, huh?” and “oooh weight, slim, weight weight blah blah blah”
It’s kinda weird having to explain to people that I’m not joining the gym and working out to lose weight. Losing weight might be a side effect but I’m not going to focus on it or set any sort of goal in that direction. All I want to do is work up a little muscle and some stamina for the summer. I want to go camping in the BWCA again but I want to go farther in and farther away from civilization and that means more canoing and more portaging. That’s it, that’s the goal, to be able to hike more.
I don’t care about being fat. Hell, I’m too fucking old to be worried what other people think. I am comfortable here. Years ago I lost a lot of weight and this is where I ended up and this is good.
As such, I spilled ice cream on my gym shirt and I’m wondering if it’s bad to go to the gym like that!
Also, I can walk a mile on the track in 10-11 minutes which is pretty good for a shorty like me.
I do need different sneakers for the gym. The trail runners are good for outside stuff but the features that make them stable and help prevent me from falling down also irritate my toes when I walk fast.

Got sick. Totally got my ass kicked by this cold. I spent the weekend resting and taking cold pills and letting David take care of me. He even brought me popsicles.
When I am sick I completely judge a person based on whether or not you will bring popsicles to me. If you do not want to bring popsicles to me when I am sick, then it is obvious you are a jerk. Sometimes flu logic is the awesomest logic.
For the record, only one person ever refused to bring popsicles to me.
Also, when I am sick I take it VERY PERSONALLY when I go to the Original Pancake House and find that they have decided to CLOSE EARLY because it is Mother’s Day!!! Mother’s day! The day they are probably the busiest!! All the Edina kids bring their moms to the OPH on mother’s day! Why did they close early?? Oh, right, because they are a nice place and they wanted their employees to spend time with their own mothers. Fine.
We went to IHOP instead. It was okay but I was really craving me some OPH!
Then I did some other things and took more cold pills and something else happened and I wrote another advice column.
and now I am trying to decide….popsicle…bed….popsicle….bed