Author Archives: bubbo
Hurricane Preparedness Action Beta
Go to your local grocery to stock up on essentials. Since you might lose power it is important to get things that do not need to be refrigerated or cooked. Contrary to that theory, however, you SHOULD buy a carton of ice cream. Buying products from your local grocery injects much needed cash into the local economy helping to ‘spur growth’ and ‘aid in the clean up process’ after the storm. Also, it makes one less thing that will go bad when the store loses power and all of its refrigerated inventory. What if I lose power? Won’t it go bad? The awesome thing about ice cream is that should you lose the ability to freeze it you just end up with a delicious chocolate peanut butter milkshake.
Everyone wins!
Be safe!
Hurricane Preparedness Action Alpha
In a cereal bowl combine one handful each of nestle dark chocolate and semisweet chocolate chips. Throw a pinch of salt in there. In a little frying pan put two handfuls of chopped walnuts and one hand of rolled oats (please keep in mind that I have preternaturally small hand, they’re almost creepy in their smallness, creepy tiny hands). Heat oats and walnuts
to goodly toastiness and then dump into the bowl of chocolate chips. Stir and mash and stir and mash, you don’t want any visible chocolate chips. At this point you will realize that a cereal bowl is too small and you will have wished you’d gone with something bigger. If you are lucky and maybe if you have regular hands, you will have already figured this out and gone with a bigger bowl at the beginning of the deal.
Stir and mash stir and mash and then unceremoniously (yes, without ceremony! This isn’t bocuse d’or, it’s a damned hurricane!) dump it out on a dinner plate and sort of mash it down and clump into pieces. Wait for it to solid up. Check the weather report. Eat some.
We do the things for all to see
My hair is orange and pink
yeah, orange and pink
Chester in the Chester Town Forest with a big piece of Chesterite
Autumn in Vermont
We went to see the colors.
and the other beautiful places
I made a hardcore pillow cover…YAAAARGH
the dogs are still dorks
David made an elaborate number 2 (heeerrrrrf snork I said number 2)
I…um…
well…
yeah
I had beauty all over the thing that is me!
Oh my god! HIHIHIhihihHIHI hi hi!
I cannot even believe how many long times it has been since I did the thing that is tell you something. Be careful because now is a regular time for me to tell you things and I have to tell you things with so many crazinesses that it might make even more problems in your head!
You should believe this.
Because I am telling you this.
The first thing that happened did it a long time weeks ago. One day, the man and the lady started taking our stuff and hiding it in boxes because I think they had a fear of robbers, except they left the boxes out where a robber could find them! How smart is that? That is zero smartnesses, even the man on the tv with the neck has more smartnesses than that and he doesn’t even know a thing about stuff. THEN!! Then one day people came over to rob our house and the man and the lady HELPED THEM!! They stole all of our stuff out of the house and the lady and the man were okay with this thing! They even carried the things out. I tried to stop them!! I yelled, “BARK BARK BARK!!! Get out of my house!!! GO AWAY OUT!!!”
This isn’t even all of the crazinesses!
They stole all of my toys and bones.
They stole them, the people stole my toys and bones and the lady and the man helped them.
This isn’t even all the craziness!
Maddie and the lady and me (Chester) all do the thing that is go to the dog park!! Finally the lady does a thing that is not wear her butt backwards.
But another craziness happens!
We go and go and go for more times than it takes to get to the dog park. And when we finally get to a place it is NOT THE DOG PARK! I could not even believe a thing that is that the lady had become a tipped over wiener stick.
The craziest thing is that the lady did this on 3 of the days in a row!!! Can you even believe this is a thing. Believe it. It is a real thing.
But none of that is a thing at all that matters!! NO!!
You listen to me and I will tell you a thing more amazing than doing tummy rubs with a peanut butter biscuit and then another thing that is so horrible it will make you do backwards poohibbities for almost an entire hour!!
Yesterday was a day that had okayness and we liked it and the man and the lady took us to a place with trees and a path and I wore my special back pack and there was so much runrunrunrun and climb and runrun and there were so many goodsmells!! SO MUCH GOOD SMELL and OH MY GOD!! It was so much of all the goodnesses!
And then… THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO ME EVER IN MY LIFE!!!!
You are the person reading this and you can’t even know how much Chester is in this.
I found a smell. I FOUND A SMELL! The smell was so good. All of the other smells I have ever found in my life can not even be added together to make this smell. It was the best smell ever!! And it wasn’t even just a smell! It was a thing that made so much smell!!
And do you want to know a thing that is what I did? I got on that smell and I rolled and rolled and rolled!! I could not even do the thing that is know that I was on the earth because the only thing I could ever know was putting this smell all over me.
And do you want to know the BEST PART EVER??? The smell was a poohibbity!! I did the thing that was like naked pig splits but with a POOHIBBITY!!! CAN YOU EVEN KNOW THIS???
I had so many many many thick smells all over my neck and face and I had almost 8 units of happinesses in me. YOU CAN NOT EVEN KNOW!! This was one poohibbity that the man DIDN’T pick up!
But a thing that happens is that no matter how many happinesses I have, there will always be the man and the lady to ruin it all for me.
Remember how I did the thing that was tell you that a thing happened that was so bad that you would do backwards poohibbities?
Hide your littles before you read this!
When I got home the man WASHED THE SMELL OFF OF ME!!
Even I can not believe this. The greatest thing ever that can happen to this little dog was COMPLETELY made to be ruined. Now the only smell that I have is the lady’s stupid shampoo.
This is a thing that happened. Other things happened but nothing of the things are a thing to talk about. In one day I did the best things ever and then the wrongest thing ever.