many of our weekends typically go like this. David and I wake up around 9ish, we debate who should take the dogs out. We fall asleep and wake up thirty minutes later to have the same debate. David takes the dogs out and comes back to bed. The people and the dogs realign themselves and we snooze some more.
Finally, David or I get up and make coffee and sometimes even breakfast for the other and we crawl back into bed. We wake up slowly, together, sipping pur coffee, eating our breakfast burritos or eggs or vegetarian biscuits and gravy while listening to NPR and playing with the dogs. Occasionally we can spend the better part of the day in bed cuddled together, reading, crocheting, giving belly rubs to deserving puppies.
I used to stress out on weekend mornings. I felt like I was failing in some way, that I should be out “there” doing “stuff” experiencing “things”. It took me a while to stop feeling guilty and to realize that spending a day in quiet comfort with the people and puppies that you love is important. I realized that I didn’t have to run constantly, I didn’t have to coordinate brunch every damned weekend, I didn’t have to wear myself out to attain some goal I didn’t want to reach.
When I look back on things, I realize that some of my favorite moments are those moments with the 4 of us bundled together listening to Prairie Home Companion or Splendid Table and laughing. When I realize how much I miss Ghengis, I am grateful for those weekend mornings I spent with him, those quiet lazy days when he fall asleep next to me, belly up, luxuriating in my attentions.
It seems so simple, not even worth talking about, but it makes me happy. This morning David took the dogs out. Later I got up and made coffee and breakfast for us. We talked, he read, I crocheted, we discussed the history of Russian politics and Maddie’s health. We spent time being quiet and just enjoying the company. We played with Chester and comforted Maddie and I am happier and more relaxed than I can express.