Remember last summer when my iPod was stolen out of my car? I never really got angry about it. I knew that in some way it was my fault, I left it out in the open and I hadn’t locked my car. I just figured it was an expensive lesson to learn.
Oh right, they also stole my FM transmitter that automatically recharged my iPod so I never had to worry about the battery dying. So yeah, iPod and swanky FM transmitter. a $300 lesson learned.
I was irritated but not angry. It’s totally my right to naively hope that the person who took it either 1) loves Mike Doughty and was stoked at getting a billion Mike Doughty songs or 2) sold it for a reasonable amount of money and used that money for something good like formula for his baby or canned food for the food shelf or leaving a really big tip at the coffee shop. I can believe these things.
So, first I remind you of the iPod, now I tell you about the drink holders.
Anyone who has owned a Swedish car will tell you that there is never a reliable cup holder. My car has these molded divots in the door pockets that will hold up to a 20oz paper coffee cup, but you can only maneuver the cup in there when the door is open and when you shut the door hot coffee with geyser out of the little hole on the lid. These molded divots do not hold my travel mug.
Volvo tried to give me a real cup holder, but they failed. It’s cold in Sweden. The people in Sweden never actually consume anything in liquid form as the liquid freezes immediate on contact with Sweden. When you say “cup” or “cupholder” to a Swede they just look at you blankly. Why on earth would anyone need a special place in their car to hold their kaffenlutebergen when you just have to lay it on the dashboard. It’s not like it’s going anywhere. Someone from America faxed over the specs for a cup holder but the ink in the Swedish fax machine was thick and sluggish so the fax was not so clear. The result is this flimsy bit that pops out of my center console. It looks like a cupholder, but it doesn’t really function as one. It wobbles, it does not hold the cup in place, it is flimsy beyond acceptable limits.
And yet I stick my coffee cup in there every morning. The cup holder has been designed with its own self preservation in mind. If I take a turn too fast or the road is bumpy it will fling the cup of coffee into my lap and cower in fear. This is why I don’t drink hot coffee.
Somebody mentioned perhaps holding the cup between my legs. This won’t work for a few reasons. The first being that I am very short and I have to sit very close to the steering wheel. Secondly, my thighs are hella fat, i can’t fit a coffee mug in there. And last, but certainly not least, I can’t think of anything more unappealing than a cup of hot coffee and my wiener in such close proximity. I don’t want to drink wiener coffee, I don’t want to threaten my wiener with hot coffee. They just don’t go together.
I am fine with this solutionless quandary.
Now, you might be wondering what my iPod and my cupholder have in common? not much on a regular level, but on a personal level, i found some closure.
Yesterday, I popped my coffee cup into the cup holder and for some reason it immediately panicked and spilled coffee everywhere. I looked down between the seat to see how much coffee was down there and I found me a $10 bill! Right there, shoved between the seats! I know it’s not much, but I don’t really remember losing $10 so it was like free money.
It was balance. My iPod was stolen but now my car gave me $10. It’s not the money, i know that $300 > $10 but it’s the principal. I lost something unexpectedly, I gained something unexpectedly. I could not be happier to have that.