2 weeks

Okay, here I am, 2 weeks into the weaning off effexor program.
How’s it going?
Well, my sleep has been wonky screwed up. In an act of desperation on Friday night I took 2 vistaril and went to bed. Took another 3 hours to get to sleep. BUT once I did fall asleep I slept! I slept HARD! I woke up at about 5pm Saturday, David brought me my espresso and a banana. I was awake about an hour and then I crashed again. I woke up at about midnight starving, ate some peanut butter/yogurt/banana/cocoa puffs mixed together and went to sleep again.
Woke up at 10am Sunday morning feeling better.
On the other hand, I’m having some ‘fight or flight’ moments. These are actually a little nicer than anxiety attacks because they only last until I realize that there is no monster. I am suddenly FILLED with ‘RUN‘ sort like if a tiger just popped up! RUN!!!! These are really easy because my brain can see that there is no stimulus beyond the sudden flood of hormones.
Um…yeah, also I’m fucking irritable as hell and pretty much just want all of the noise to shut up. If you are going to make a noise or eat my ice cream or move suddenly or suggest even the most neutral of ideas I just might chew the skin from your body and slap you (not really…well, maybe! I mean really, don’t fuck with me!).
My dreams are even more vivid than before. That’s one thing I will miss about the effexor, I love those crazy vivid dreams.
plus, listlessness, scatterbrain, a serious need to protect the ice cream, anxiety about leaving the house, total absentmindedness
All in all, it’s not too bad at this point. The week of the crimson tide is on its way and really, any of these issues can easily be attributed to that.
Monday Morning Addition:
Yesterday was not a great day. Irritability and anxiety were very high. I felt as though my nerves were closer to the surface than usual. I could not deal with anything! David had asked me to go to bar trivia with him. I’d agreed to go, but once the time came, I just couldn’t. It was too too much. Have I mentioned how lucky I am to have him? His patience is STUNNING to me; it is actually quite humbling at times. It is this patience that becomes my incentive. How could I not want to be 100% for the person he loves so much? I mean if he’s willing to put up with this much for this long, then she must be pretty awesome. I want to go back to being that awesome person again.