This morning in my regular running late flurrious rush I grabbed my Hello Kitty lunch box out of the fridge and it was covered in cold, wet goo. Ah fuck, something in my lunch must have leaked. It wasn’t the chili because that is reddish brown, not clear, it wasn’t the clementine, those don’t really leak so much and it wasn’t the tortilla chips because…well that’s just crazy.
I figured there must have been a breach in my yogurt seal and it was leaking sweetened yogurt whey goo all over the fridge.
Nope. Dry.
So, obviously, the Alien decided to hide in my fridge and drip goo everywhere. Do not touch the goo.
I emptied my lunch box, tossed the perishables into the fridge and left.
At work I realized that I put my lunch back in the fridge. That was stupid. Now I can’t eat my lunch because it is 5.3 miles away. The goo never actually touched the food, just the lunch box. I am retarded. Retarded and hungry.