Booger

This is the obligatory “i’ve been at death’s door” whine. And for Julie’s reading pleasure, it will include descriptions of snot.
It was your standard fill my head and lungs with snot and pain. My ears hurt, my throat hurt, my soft palate hurt. My abs are totally RIPPED from all the coughing. When I open my mouth I can see actual rivers of snot running down the back of my throat directly into my stomach. In fact, there is such a constant, heavy flow of snot that I am amazed that 1) my body can seemingly produce and consume an infinite amount of snot and 2) that my head has not shrunk or my belly exploded.
I am also coughing up copious amounts of snot laden loogie.
I sound like a pteradactyl sodomized my vocal chords.
On Friday my mother came down for birthday dinner. It was somewhat overwhelming, my mother, her father, my boyfriend, my sister, HER boyfriend and his parents. I tried to remain low-key, i didn’t have enough cold pills in my system to last me very long, but 2 glasses of retsina conspired against me and the cold pills wore off with a vengeance. Ow.
Dinner went well, and at the end I even managed to tell keith’s parents that i was usually more charming than this.
David brought me to Walgreens and I got to do the special “we’re watching you so don’t make meth with these medicines” thing! You can’t just buy drugs that have pseudoephedrine in them anymore (and believe me, you cannot get a cold pill without it). You pick the medicines you want, take the special label card off the rack and bring it to the pharmacist. He gets the pills for you and then fills out a special binder with your name and address and the total number of grams of pseudoephedrine you buy. Cool. I don’t think he’d ever seen anyone so excited about something so mundane.
I had to be excited because the alternative was to acknowledge that the reality was that no one was ever going to look at that book or cross reference it with any other books and that while it might slow down the small time producer, it will do nothing to stem the tide of meth flowing in from Mexico.
Am I opposed to the war on drugs? To an extent, I think there is a huge discrepancey between money spent and results seen, and some of the results we’ve seen are asinine. I am, however, opposed to meth more than I am opposed to the war on drugs. Meth is a filthy drug, the physical and environmental costs of meth are enormous. You wanna smoke a little weed on the weekends with your friends? Hey, if you can hold down a job, pay your bills, whatever, then go ahead and spark up. Meth isn’t the same, and I have yet to see a tweaker that didn’t go from good times to bad shit on the short path.
but whatever. I signed the book and rejoiced and then pondered how much you have to buy before the authorities got inolved. I figured two boxes of cold pills weren’t going to trigger anyone’s alarms. Just in case, though, they could come see the amazing Rio Snot winding down my throat.
Saturday found me freaking out and needing to get Maddie to the et as soon as possible but also needing David to bring us there as I was hugely sick and unable to do it alone. Oh dear god we had to go so fast, the vet closed at noon and I couldn’t make her wait until MONDAY! Yes, I freaked out and ran the dog to the vet to find out she has allergies. Her eyes were all gooey, I was convinced she had a terrible infection, I could not make her wait all weekend!!! I got some goo for her eyes and she’s fine. The vet also looked at her foot and proclaimed the swollen pads to also be allergies and to continue treating as I had been, but her foot’s not getting better so back she goes.
What the hell is it with these dogs?
Saturday night! Betsy’s housewarming! I remember being pilled out of my head, I remember eating huge amounts of belgian honeyed goat cheese, I remember not having a voice, I remember delicious crab rolls, I remember the cutest little dog EVER!! (seriously, I need to get a picture of Gary, he’s so damned CUTE). I remember having a great time and I remember coming home and going to bed.
Sunday, I did nothing. I hauled my snot filled body from the bed to the sofa, I watched the Simpsons all day. David made me some cream of wheat at some point. I completely buzzed out on Robitussin with Codeine. I never got dressed. I was a dead weight.
Then I went to bed again. Everytime I fall asleep I start sweating like a freak, it’s really gross. I want this cold to be over.
Today I felt like jelly and mostly sat still and did not move. The cold pills killed my appetite, i managed to eat 1/2 a grilled cheese before my system threatened to revolt. David made me some sesame-miso noodles but I could only eat a little but. Anything that isn’t sweet tastes off, like metal or burnt wood. I ate a little peanut butter, but still, couldn’t eat much.
I’m going to let the dogs out and then soak in the tub. Alex sent me Dan Simmons’ ‘Ilium’ and I am anxious to get started on that, but I have to finish re-reading ‘House of Leaves’ before I start anything new.
There, I posted, I hope Julie is happy with how snot filled this post is!