Don’t go grocery shopping when you are hungry. Especially don’t go grocery shopping at 11pm on a Saturday night after you’ve spent the entire day doing but lazing in bed, crocheting, surfing the net or lazing…AND ESPECIALLY if all you’ve eaten all day is 1 box of candy hearts in español left over from last valentines day, some cashews and 4 shots of espresso over coffee ice cream.
We got some apples and bananas and pineapples…thus ended the reasonable portion of the trip. Prepackaged bbq ribs, 4 boxes of Hormel sausages with Tabasco, 1 pack of brats, 1 pack of cheddarwurst, 2 rope sausages, 5 pizzas, 2 boxes of cereal, 1 box of fudgesicles, 1 box of Kemps Float Bars, 2 kinds of croutons, a caramel apple (i wanted 2, David slipped on back into the bin. Grumpface), 5 packs of pudding cups, and…oh the shame…prepackaged iceberg lettuce!
this is why I am fat.
There used to be days where the conveyor belt was pretty much just squash and kale and zucchini and fennel and carrots and maybe a little pork roast for me. The worst thing we would buy would be the occasional box of mac and cheese or some ice cream. I’ve fallen so far! It was so easy too. I don’t watch tv, i’m not constantly inundated with commands to shove “current popular processed cheese food flavor snack chip” in my mouth. I don’t have to consider my placement in society based on my beverage purchase.
Hell, I don’t even have the urge to cook anymore. Half the time I’m looking for something that will fit in my mouth and isn’t fuzzy.
hmmmm maybe I should get a carbon monoxide detector…because something MUST be breaking my head.
Category Archives: Delicious
not really all that grown up
it’s almost 9:20pm and I haven’t eaten dinner yet. I’m sitting here, starving half to death (STAAAAAAARVING). I am waiting for the dishwasher to get done so I can get my giant cereal bowl out and make a great big bowl of Reeses Puffs/Fruity Cheerios/Multigrain Cheerios.
God forbid I take a moment and think of something real to eat. oh no, it would be too much effort! No, I’ll just slump my body over to one side and wait for the
HA! as I type this the dishwasher made its special “I’m done!” groan. Now I have to go run cold water over my bowl so I don’t have to eat hot cheerios.
What’s with all the anger at Martha? I, too, can do a great many things
that Martha Stewart can do, but not all as well or as elegantly as she can.
As for your comment about MArtha going to jail—WHAT’S IT TO YOU!!! Stop
acting like some holier than thou snob! Besides if she’d been a man she
would have been rewarded for refusing to give up her info. Lets face facts
they only went after MArtha because she refused to bend over and take it up
the ass which is what most Republicans expect us all to do. I bet you’re a
George Bush fan as well!! Well, now there’s an true idiot for you!! The
only thing I figure is that you can’t do much of anything right and are
jealous of Martha Stewart. What’s wrong can’t get a cookie to turn out
right!! By the way I bake my own bread, paint my own artwork, do my own
crafts, sew, crochet, etc, etc, etc and have even raised 7 children What
are YOUR accomplishments honey; I don’t recall reading your last book or
watching YOUR television show. Get the point!!!!!!
I got this response today from a very old post I made, back when I made my first batch of jam. In only a single sentence I make a very tongue in cheek joke about Martha Stewart.
Obviously this person did not bother to read any of the rest of the site. If she had read more she’d know that I adore Martha for all her good ideas and deep seated nuttiness, I don’t idolize her or anything, that’s unhealthy. She might know about the various crafts and projects I undertake. She might have even gotten an idea of where my politics lie.
And so I am left to wonder, does this person surf the net daily to find mentions of Martha and defend her? Or was this just some sort of cosmic joke? Either way, I felt that a comment this important should not be lost to the ether….attached to a post 15 months old.
Late night in my house
I gathered up my yarn and tools and put them away. I closed my laptop and put it down. This is the signal that I’m heading to bed. David saw this and put his guitar down and started to get up.
David: Okay, it’s time, my fingers hurt.
Me: are you coming to bed too?
David: Yeah.
Me: Oh. Cuz I was going to bring the pie to bed.
David: You’re going to bring the pie to bed?
mmm peach pie.
Able was I ere I saw Palindromes
We got Palindromes from Netflix the other day. Meh. I wasn’t all that taken with it. Reviews kept calling it funny. It wasn’t funny. There were a few goofy moments but overall, it wasn’t funny. There were so many other ways to describe it: sad, hopeless, upsetting, stilted and forced, poorly thought out, gimmicky, devastating.
I just wasn’t all that taken with it. The idea of using different actresses (and one actor) to play the main character might have worked if the personalities of the actresses (and actor) defined a characteristic of Aviva,, the main character. As proof of my utter lack of soul, I just did not like the very young actress that played young Aviva. Sticking your tongue way out when you talk in order to fake a lisp doesn’t make you cute or precocious, it just means your mom lied to you about how to look cute.
anyway.
It’s PMS/miss ghengis terribly/get weepy/become territorial about my cereal and ice cream/feel apathetic week, the week out of every month that makes David ask himself what the hell he’s doing with a giant glandular sloth in the house.
Instead of calling animal control on me, he bought me a peach pie. Nothing says I love you like not having you hauled away to a zoo when you truly deserve it. Nothing says long term commitment like peach pie instead of a kick in the ass. The peach pie is delicious and happy and surprisingly peachy!
After taking way too much effexor the other day, I realized just how lovely it is not to give a shit! My god! It was awesome. You want to complain to me? Go ahead, I don’t care! Make bad decisions and not take responsibility? I’m here to hear and not listen! Run a red light and almost t-bone me? Go ahead, I honestly could not care any less (also my power steering thingy is making loud noises so make sure you hit that part of the car so it will be covered on the insurance). Chew up the sofa? let me add peanut butter to the cushion for you. Seriously, I just could not bring myself to care and it was incredibly liberating.
Unfortunately, I’m pretty sure that the doctor is not going to allow me to bump my prescription all the way up to 450 mgs just so I can become a dick. She’ll tell me to work on being a dick at this dosage first.
and in better news, I’m in the middle of calculating and designing a sweater since the awesome cabled version I showed you the other day just would not work with the yarn I have and I don’t feel like buying more yarn. Wait, wrong, I do feel like buying more yarn, every day I feel like buying more yarn, I just don’t want to buy more yarn for a sweater. I have other actual projects that need to be worked on first.
Bumble ramble I got nothing else. Stay sharp my marshmallows!